I have been home for over a month now, it is safe to say I have settled back into my pre-Ethiopia lifestyle but it certainly took some time and with it there is an underlying sense of unease. The subject question is something I have been asked by just about everyone I have spoken to since I came back, read on for my thoughts and conclusion…
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| Two days of travelling and I came home to this which was perfect! |
Preparing to go away filled me with excitement, trepidation and curiosity. My actual journey was rammed with emotions that I had been told I would experience, but did not think I actually would. This made dealing with them that much harder, being able to rationally understand them and contextualise them was tough.
I found myself regularly questioning my views, other peoples’ views and learning about topics that prior to travelling I had not given much attention to. For example; Millennium Development Goals (MDGs), Female Genital Mutilation (FGM), Harmful Traditional Practice (HTP), and areas surrounding religion, education, health and gender equality.
I know I could not have done it without the support of the friends that I made, considering as a team we only met on the day of our departure travel the bonds we formed over three months are similar to those of people I have known for years. Out of the UK team I came to be particularly close to three girls, they are responsible for keeping me sane and smiling. The four of us are so different in so many ways and yet we have this chapter of our lives in common and that is what makes our friendship unique.
I found myself regularly questioning my views, other peoples’ views and learning about topics that prior to travelling I had not given much attention to. For example; Millennium Development Goals (MDGs), Female Genital Mutilation (FGM), Harmful Traditional Practice (HTP), and areas surrounding religion, education, health and gender equality.
I know I could not have done it without the support of the friends that I made, considering as a team we only met on the day of our departure travel the bonds we formed over three months are similar to those of people I have known for years. Out of the UK team I came to be particularly close to three girls, they are responsible for keeping me sane and smiling. The four of us are so different in so many ways and yet we have this chapter of our lives in common and that is what makes our friendship unique.
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| The four of us briefly reunited at our Returned Volunteer weekend |
The Ethiopian volunteers were an eclectic mix of people, and they brought their culture, views and personalities to everything they did and certainly taught me a fair few things. My counterpart and I had an explosive (sometimes bombs and sometimes fireworks) type of relationship, we would debate, agree, disagree, laugh, smile, cry and shout together but actually I needed him. He educated me, translated for me and cared for me, as I did for him and this relationship is what I think makes the ICS program ideal for first time overseas volunteers.
Our team were fortunate that our placement town, Hawassa, had mobile phone reception, internet availability and plenty of internet cafes to make use of. This made staying in contact with our loved ones back home so much easier and this truly got me through. I learnt that being away from home is not an endurance test to see how long you can go without contacting home because actually you need that connection sometimes. A familiar voice or a sentimental email does wonders for your morale. You may recall a post titled S.W.A.L.K – this was also a great coping mechanism for me and one that I would really recommend for other people.
Although most of the time I felt like I was only ever sharing negative thoughts; it was not a wholly negative experience. Sure, there were days when I went home after seeing homeless people laying helplessly in the street, knowing that even if I could give some loose change it would make very little difference to their situation, I just wanted to cry because I felt helpless and heartless. Then there were days were I had laughed so much, felt so proud and upbeat that I almost felt ashamed of my previous negativity.
Our team were fortunate that our placement town, Hawassa, had mobile phone reception, internet availability and plenty of internet cafes to make use of. This made staying in contact with our loved ones back home so much easier and this truly got me through. I learnt that being away from home is not an endurance test to see how long you can go without contacting home because actually you need that connection sometimes. A familiar voice or a sentimental email does wonders for your morale. You may recall a post titled S.W.A.L.K – this was also a great coping mechanism for me and one that I would really recommend for other people.
Although most of the time I felt like I was only ever sharing negative thoughts; it was not a wholly negative experience. Sure, there were days when I went home after seeing homeless people laying helplessly in the street, knowing that even if I could give some loose change it would make very little difference to their situation, I just wanted to cry because I felt helpless and heartless. Then there were days were I had laughed so much, felt so proud and upbeat that I almost felt ashamed of my previous negativity.
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| An action shot of one of the many laughs I had |
I soon learnt that looking to quantify my effectiveness as a volunteer was a sure way of slipping into a melancholic state, and actually there was no need to because I knew in myself that I was trying hard and that was enough. The smallest things that you do, almost as second nature, can mean so much to the people it affects. In hindsight part of me wishes that I had just been myself rather than trying to ‘achieve’ things and being able to tally success.
So, would I do it again? Yes, but maybe not for some time and potentially not for as long. Why? Honestly, because I enjoyed my time there and living somewhere is not the same as visiting for a holiday but being away from my loved ones for that long took its toll. My opinion to foreign aid has also changed considerably and I strongly believe that skills and funds are what developing countries need, because sadly it is evident that funds alone are not filtering down to where they are needed. So being able to take skills to where they are needed is something I am passionate about.
I have so many thanks to give for my experience being what is was; my husband, family and friends in the UK for being so supportive, and having faith in me. All the people who sponsored me and helped with my fundraising to make my trip possible and supporting the charity I chose to work with. The UK and Ethiopian volunteers who taught me, helped me and tolerated my erratic mood changes. My host family who welcomed me so warmly into their home, cared for me, accepted me and provided for me. My placement organisation for teaching me so much about myself, and also the school teachers I worked with for being so appreciative of me. All the beneficiaries I met for speaking openly and truthfully about their life experiences and welcoming me into their homes. My program supervisors for being there when I wanted to leave and never doubting my abilities. The children in the streets, schools and homes I visited for always guaranteeing to warm my heart and make me smile. And of course VSO and ICS for giving me this opportunity!
Please feel free to post questions if you want to know more, I've been as brief as I can be but there is just so much that could be said!
So, would I do it again? Yes, but maybe not for some time and potentially not for as long. Why? Honestly, because I enjoyed my time there and living somewhere is not the same as visiting for a holiday but being away from my loved ones for that long took its toll. My opinion to foreign aid has also changed considerably and I strongly believe that skills and funds are what developing countries need, because sadly it is evident that funds alone are not filtering down to where they are needed. So being able to take skills to where they are needed is something I am passionate about.
I have so many thanks to give for my experience being what is was; my husband, family and friends in the UK for being so supportive, and having faith in me. All the people who sponsored me and helped with my fundraising to make my trip possible and supporting the charity I chose to work with. The UK and Ethiopian volunteers who taught me, helped me and tolerated my erratic mood changes. My host family who welcomed me so warmly into their home, cared for me, accepted me and provided for me. My placement organisation for teaching me so much about myself, and also the school teachers I worked with for being so appreciative of me. All the beneficiaries I met for speaking openly and truthfully about their life experiences and welcoming me into their homes. My program supervisors for being there when I wanted to leave and never doubting my abilities. The children in the streets, schools and homes I visited for always guaranteeing to warm my heart and make me smile. And of course VSO and ICS for giving me this opportunity!
Please feel free to post questions if you want to know more, I've been as brief as I can be but there is just so much that could be said!
Kx
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